Youthful Life: X

"My alone feels so good, I’ll only have you if you’re sweeter than my solitude” Warsan Shire Find someone, meet someone, be with someone - we live in a society that deems us incomplete lest we have someone else. I don't subscribe to that ideology. I believe in wholeness. I believe in additions not completions. I believe in co-creation not achievement. Togetherness is not the opposite of singledom. People are often "together" but distanced and isolated nonetheless. The more I move through life I have come to realize that what people want, need, and desire in others varies - drastically. For some, the quest for their one true love, their perfect match, soul mate, if you will occupies them. It seems effortless.  For others, it's people that may not "fit" together but put in the effort to make it work. For others still it's a sort of crowd-sourcing, so that their "someone" is not their everything - it's sharing different kinds of...

"Beauty is power; a smile is its sword." John Ray The process of becoming "pretty" or at least "prettier" has been fascinating for me. I vividly remember how people used to look through me, as if I wasn't there, as if I was invisible, as I wasn't even worth a passing glance. Now I get stared at, people do double-takes, and I feel too  seen. Couple that with the rarity of my deeply rich blackness in predominantly white spaces and its impossible for me to separate out what's the discomfort or fascination of me being black with me being aesthetically pleasing. Either way, I'm getting a lot more attention because of the way I look and I don't quite know how to deal with it. It seems like a fluke, a practical joke, or some kind of cruel prank but people are genuinely taking an interest in me. The compliments whether it be on my clothing, my smile, or my everything in general just come from every which way. I'm having difficulty a...