Youthful Life: X

Truth - Complete and utter silence is a rarity in this world. We spend our lives constantly on the go and take little to no time to just be, to be present, to be real, to be one with the world instead of trying to master in. There's so much noise in lives. Distractions abound, pressures build, and stress is constantly weighing us down. There always seems to be more that we can do, but to what end? When does it stop? Will it ever? There has to be some place for us to be alone with ourselves. Where is your sanctuary?   "Solitude is as needful to the imagination as society is wholesome for the character." James Russell Lowell     There seems to be this generational fear of being alone. It's this oddly striking thing others say to me. "I don't like being alone. I'm afraid that I'm going to end up by myself. I'm bored out of my mind." I realize that we go through this abrupt change where our environments shift. We grow up surrounded by p...

Truth - Self-esteem has to come for yourself. Too many times we look to others to determine our value and self-worth. It makes absolutely no sense. The key words in those hyphenated compound words is the "self" portion meaning us. We must be the ones to determine how we feel about ourselves, our bodies, our minds, our hearts, and our souls. No one else can do so. It has to be us. We have to decide for ourselves how will be embrace who we are, how we are, and why we are. It is time today, and every single day to write our own stories and be proud of our narratives. We are authors. "Self-love is the source of all our other loves" Pierre Corneille We are authors of our own life stories. Why then would we let anyone else be the protagonist in our stories? Our first-person adventures detail our experiences, hardships, and successes. Others may try to pen a few lines of our dialogue but we script our own soliloquys. Supporting characters may try to co-opt our sto...

Truth - Knowledge is power. What we choose to do with that power though makes all the difference. Knowledge can be used to the benefit of others. It can be a tool utilized for liberation just as easily at it be a used to oppress. Knowledge can provide choice, agency, and control in the same ways that it can limit, obscure, and dictate. Knowledge does not come with an inherent values judgment. Those who bear it's weight must decide what to do with it. This is knowledge. "Knowledge is power. Information is liberating. Education is the premise of progress, in every society, in every family." Kofi Annan Do you ever feel like you just know too much? It sounds like the plot of a 1920's crime ring that you have just unwittingly uncovered, and you're set to be "taken care of" because you gained some knowledge you weren't supposed to have. There is this unspoken burden that comes with knowledge. You have to do something with it otherwise it is truly mea...

Truth - Life is a series of choices. We are constantly tasked with making choices whether we are conscious of them or not. In some instances there seems to be much a myriad of options and at other times we feel limited but nonetheless we are made to choose. Regardless of our preparedness we have to choose, and even deciding not to choose is a paradoxical choice in and of itself. We learn what we need to choose in our lifelong of practice of choosing. This is choice.   "There are three constants in life... change, choice and principles." Stephen Covey One of the many dilemmas my generation faces is the abundance of choice. Now, more than any other time in history, we are given more choices. We have options, opportunities, and less boundaries. From what we eat to where we live, to what we do and how we do it - choice after choice is presented to us. Our challenge is to manage the smaller choices while tackling the gargantuan ones as well. Even that dichotomy though pla...

Truth - law and order, when administered fairly, prevent anarchy. Society needs boundaries, rules, and regulations to avoid chaos. If the natural order of the universe is to gravitate towards disorder then humanity is diametrically opposed to the way things are. We have to give up some of our freedoms to gain protection, parameters, and oversight. That sacrifice however is supposed to come with the insurance that more often than not what we have gained will outweigh the cost of what we have lost. In a time where civil unrest regularly is part of the national conversation, this is policing. "To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in a rage almost all the time." James A. Baldwin We need law enforcement. We need authority. We need police. We need policing. We need police to to think better, do better, and be better. Police play a critical role in ensuring that our society does not denigrate into dystopian catastrophe. They are charged with...

Truth - There is a difference between intelligence, intellect, and wisdom. Intelligence refers most often to feelings whereas intellect is rooted in a distinguishing facts. Wisdom is having experience, knowledge, or good judgement. Oftentimes the words are used interchangeably but the distinction is key particularly in a world that values certain demonstrations of intelligence. What does it mean to be smart? "I know that I am intelligent because I know that I know nothing" Socrates There's this commonly held belief that people with certain educational attainments or who hold some job titles have this omniscient infinite knowledge. Doctors, lawyers, engineers, and others with MDs, Ph.Ds, JDs, and all the other terminal degree letters behind their names are who comes to mind. When you have had the access and opportunity to have such an extensive formalized education, there is this level of social respect that is also gained but is it placed rightfully or not? Those a...

Truth - Relationship above all else is paramount to the human experience. We exist in relation to one another. We persist because of our connections to those who matter to us. We grow, change, and survive because we have interact with others. Isolation, solitude, and loneliness in all its forms is the antithetical of who we are and how we are. In moderation they can give us solace but in excess they present themselves as threats to our humanity. This is connection.  "Since you cannot do good to all, you are to pay special attention to those who, by the accidents of time, or place, or circumstances, are brought into closer connection with you." Saint Augustine Here's my story of dealing with mental health and thoughts of suicide:  #LiveForTomorrow If I had the power to change anything the world it would be that saying how you actually feel all the time could be socially acceptable. The way society's and socialization work truly are mind-boggling. We learn the...

Truth - Siblings are the best gift your parents can ever give you. A question I often as people is whether they are an only child or not. As someone who often gets mistaken as one, the question gives some insight. I always follow up as to how close they are with their siblings, an even more telling answer. Everyone's familial situations are different. Deeply messed up stuff happens, and the people who are related to us can be awful. When families have healthy relationships though, the results can be truly awe-inspiring. You never know joy until you become an uncle. "When I was young, an eccentric uncle decided to teach me how to lie. Not, he explained, because he wanted me to lie, but because he thought I should know how it's done so I would recognize when I was being lied to." Brian Eno Being an uncle is by far my favorite personal identity. Beyond being a son to wonderful parents, and brother to four of the most dynamic people I have ever known is something ...

Truth - Socialization is a process by which we are indoctrinated into a society. It's an ever-changing and lifelong series of occurrences that guide the ways in which we are able to interact with one another. The range of what is socially acceptable versus inappropriate or completely taboo is vast. In some ways socialization conveys to us the rules of the world and how to move through it, but it others it adds restrictions. What happens when you step outside the boundaries of social norms? What if we defy social constructs? What if we touch? "You are defined by your ingredients, by the way you touch them, by the flavors you draw from them." Graham Elliot You know what's both fascinating and saddening simultaneously is the fact that in some point of your childhood, your parents put you down, and never picked you up again. Obviously there are logistical issues that add to why that is, but from a social standpoint it's kind of odd. Think about it. As babies w...

Truth - Money only has value because we have made it that way. Think about it just like we covet dirty green pieces of paper with dead white men's faces on them we could just as easily be doing the same with q-tips, buttons, or pebbles. The object is arbitrary but the way we idolize it is where it gets all it's power from. Some say does not bring happiness, and while that may be true, it most definitely gives you access to obtaining it. More money more problems, but are some of those self-induced? This is unrestricted.  "Wealth is the ability to fully experience life" Henry David Thoreau In this day and age where the vast majority of people are seriously struggling to make ends meet, it has almost become taboo to speak on the topic of wealth. Who has it? What is it? Why does it matter? There has always been this shroud of secrecy and pretending when it comes to socioeconomic status. People put on a show to act as if they have more  (and sometimes less) than...

Truth - Sometimes the biggest obstacle standing in our way can be none other than us ourselves. What if happiness is a conscious choice to be positive, show gratitude, and demonstrate kindness to others? Regardless of whatever circumstances we might find ourselves in there still remains an element of choice in how we conduct ourselves. It can mean all the difference. The only thing we can ever control in life is ourselves. If we stand in our own way, the only one we have to blame is us. This is sabotage.   "I think that sometimes love gets in the way of itself - you know, love interrupts itself. We want things so much that we sabotage them." Jack White I have a confession to make. I am someone who self-sabotages. There, I said it. What's even worst about is that I am self-aware and know why I do it when I'm doing it, and yet I still continue to purposefully demolish potential relationships before they have a chance to solidify. I use humor as a defense mechani...

Truth - There are so many unwritten rules that we abide be on a daily basis. Humans are some of the most devastatingly fascinating creatures to observe and to interact with. It's as if each individual has their own personal guidebook to follow in addition to some deeply etched away commandments that we communally agree to (with or without our consent). We stumble upon one another and must quickly decide which set of guidelines we are supposed to follow in order to appropriately treat one another. In the grand scheme of things the laws keep us safe but also separated; it's a danger that more often than not pays off benevolently when we throw out the rules and follow our hearts. Do you have what it takes? Are you in the league?  "I don't know the first real thing about the dating game. I don't know how to talk to a specific person and connect. I just think you have to go to person by person and do the best you can with people in general." Jason Schwartzman...