Youthful Life: X

" I don’t believe rape is inevitable or natural. If I did, I would have no reason to be here. If I did, my political practice would be different than it is. Have you ever wondered why we [women] are not just in armed combat against you? It’s not because there’s a shortage of kitchen knives in this country. It is because we believe in your humanity, against all the evidence.”  Andrea Dworkin For once , I don't really know how to start this post but I have a lot of thoughts. Bear with me as I just go ahead and write them. I think about the ways in which I have to come to understand how to be articulate some of the more amorphous concepts that float around the concert experiences I have. One of those being this idea of emotional labor - both a term created/used in feminist theory, and in capitalist ideology. Emotional labor is basically a self-awareness of being able to consciously manage and process "appropriately" your emotions. I interpret it as being able to...

Truth - The greater life lessons we learn oftentimes do not manifest themselves until long after an experience has concluded. Love can be so pervasive and yet so elusive. Recognizing love for what it is can be a difficult thing to ability to cultivate. In doing so though we learn better how to choose for ourselves. We choose love. We choose our family. We choose those that we let in to our lives. We give invitations, make promises, and pledges ourselves in pacts. This is my fraternity pact. "We're on a planet. At the same time. In the Universe ... Let's do something great together!” Jeff Byington   In my post-undergrad life , the significance of my "lifelong" membership in a fraternal organization has faded into little more than fond memories of weekends spent having stupidly hilarious conversation to the soundtrack of early 2000s hits, bureaucratic unproductive chapter meetings, and semblances of interfraternal communal collaborations. I rarely wear my le...

Truth - Saying goodbye may be one of the hardest I ever end up having to do. I guess it's the finality of the statement that signifies a severance, a disconnect, and an indefinite end. It's the ambiguity of not knowing when but even more if you will ever see someone again in person that makes it so difficult. I can say all I want that this is only see you later, but the actuality is that if I do not make the effort to visit or stay in touch with people, goodbye may be the last parting words some hear from me. There's a big difference between goodbye or farewell, and see you later/soon. No matter what some connection make it through it all - that's forever and always.   "You don't have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body." C.S. Lewis It's so easy to come into situations with this attitude or mindset that you're there for one reason only. You can accomplish your goal but it becomes apparent quickly if life has other plans for your...

The 20s are all about constructing your family. To call someone your family means something spiritually significant. Families are tethered together by energy, feelings, and beliefs that transcend time, place, and space. No matter where you are, your connection to your family can never be severed. Their irreplaceable importance means their essence becomes ensconced with your own. Your family is permanently bound to you. Even more so, when that family is the product of your active selection that unification holds sincere gravitas. They are your dearly beloved.   Honestly, I don't really know what to write for this post. I had so many different ideas of what I was going to convey but none of them seemed appropriate for what I wanted to get across. I'm going to switch it up and just write an open letter to my fraternity brothers.   Dearly Beloved , Thank you for letting me be part of your college family. There is intentionality in me using ...

The 20s are about breaking boundaries, and knocking down barriers to progress. There are so many questions to be asked on college campuses and of us as young people. What is stopping us? What prevents us from talking about the tough things, the things that aren't so picturesque, but the things that are most real . Why is socially unacceptable to have problems, to acknowledge their existence and most of all to talk about them? Why does it make us uncomfortable? This is what happens when there's a man down. Fraternity /sorority life is an absolutely amazing community to be apart of. It's not for everyone, but if you find your fit - it can/will change your life forever. While it does foster camaraderie to certain extent, it is also problematic in the attitudes, ideals, and behaviors its members sometimes perpetuate. This past week was my college's "Greek Week" - a time for all chapters to get involved, celebrate together in the spirit of competition. Never hav...

Being a teenager is all about marriage. Pause right there, no I did NOT knock a girl up and am trying to do the right thing and wife her up  (Maury would prove I was NOT the father anyway). None of that 16 and pregnant nonsense or psycho Lifetime women with bridal fever. Marriage, that is the uniting of two people becoming one, is a sacred thing (well not in this day and age). Holy matrimony, I do's and all the lovey-dovey smooching in between. It's about honesty, unconditional love, and true vulnerability. Wedding bells are about to ring, don't get cold feet.  So you're probably wondering what's up with all this wedding stuff, well my oldest brother, Rocky, is getting married to his fiancee, Kristen, this weekend! Yup, one of us five is taking the leap of faith and officially starting his life with someone else. Honestly, I can't believe it and I'm shock, and won't really come to terms with it until we're all getting dressed up in tuxedos and d...

Being a teenager is all about seeing a kindred spirit. It's about getting back the fronts people put up and getting a glimpse into who they really are. It's about going deeper, seeing the humanity and all the insecurities we all share. When people retract the curtain and you're given a peek into their inner workings, you're entire perception of people changes. We drop the veil. One of the problems people have with making friends is getting back this weird phase where you're stuck between acquaintances and friendship. Someone has to initiate crossing to bridge and move on from talking about class, weather and food - we all have backup friends and parents for that boredom (do I look like you're lawyer?). We need more, something real, and something we can work with. We have to see the people behind the capes, make up, and facades. Who's behind there (but supehero masks work though, even Oliver Queen though?). What lies beneath? Who are you when there's ...