Thirst Trap or Nah

The 20s are all about figuring out the randomness of the world around you. There always seems to be so much going on and it can be tough to manage it all sometimes. Somehow we do it on the daily. Life is a complicated thing with all it's various aspects. This semester in particular I've come to see life nothing more than relationships whether that be with a higher power, family, friends, or even potential partners. We're all trying to maneuver this complicated web of relationships. Is this is thirst trap or nah?

This past weekend was the RHA end of semester banquet where I ended up giving a speech on what I'd learned through my time with the organization, that is the value of people and our relationships. Relationships are how create boundaries and shape our world. The reason why strangers fluster us so much is because we don't have a relationship and don't know how to orient ourselves immediately. That's absolutely terrifying. Every single person we meet knows something we don't know. Every person we come into contact with has the potential to become a friend. Everyone who passes by us has a life full of experiences and stories just as we do. The thing is relationships are necessary for people to be real. Sunday night after my fraternity chapter meeting I dropped by the RHA office to see if new president Sam wanted to join in on the wings Jake and I were going to order (didn't actually happen so #fail) and in talking to him I realized how little our relationship had ever actually progressed. It didn't go anywhere and there was an unnamed tension, some very apparent apprehension and a total lack of trust lingering. We didn't even have the basics down to move from superficial things like work to share the details of our lives. There wasn't a buy in from either of us. The conversation was unfruitful but very telling to say the least. Why should we care about anything the other has to say, we don't even know if either of us cares about the other person. You can't go deeper without breaching the surface first. You cannot speak powerful truths or be candidly honest with a person if you don't have some semblance of trust (trust that what I'm saying is because we're on that level). The harsh reality is that some relationships may never progress pass the basic stuff and you know what, that's okay. Not everyone gets to see the gigantic iceberg underneath it all. He said that he didn't know the real me and that he didn't feel like I was authentic with him and at first I was like this dude is calling me fake, but no maybe there was some veracity to it. You get the prepackaged perfectly socially acceptable version until you've proven yourself able and willing to protect the truth of who someone is ... and that's real. Is this a thirst trap or nah? 

 

There are days where you just wonder how the actually hell you're going to make it through and Friday was one of those. I tried to do my laundry (tried being the operative word there) my separate times and I thought was being slick doing it during the day, but no such luck, everyone and their moms was in that damn laundry room. I sat through another physics lecture and came back to do some homework. Finally I was able to complete the quad and use all four washing machines at the same time (I'm that pretentious guy; once a month okay). On to evaluating nominations for that brunch that I mentioned earlier. I was doing what I always do, using my words effectively and getting to the point. A pet peeve of mine is non-quantifiable evaluations - what does it mean if you say that you think someone is "nice" or a "great person." That tells me absolutely nothing about them, why and how? Finished that process after a couple of hours, and got ready to head to Relay for Life. I went in there, not having it after a miscommunication via phone, but immediately cheered up when I saw my fraternity brothers, Zach, Joe, Will and Connor. I made the rounds and said hello to some of my favorite people, Renée, Audrey, Sarah and Emma from Panhellenic and started the walk. I caught up with Bela, Campbell after passing by Jake and Dzenan. Round and round we went, walking, skipping, dancing, hanging and all the rest. There were some live performances, some a cappella, a comedian, and an absolutely amazing hypnotist show (don't know if I believe it, but it definitely was entertaining) throughout the night but it was relationship building time. I spent some much needed quality time with Willy and Bucky (I need to stop nicknaming Connor) talking about our lives, oppression (cause you know casual conversation), and some our insecurities. It was so refreshing to be able to speak freely. Soon more and more people left and somehow it got to be nearly 7 hours since I had arrived at 9PM the night before. The last hour with Bucky was spent eating bagel sticks and trying to muster up the courage to talk to a cute sorority sister. Obviously, I'm socially awkward as hell and it didn't actually happen, but it sure was hilarious getting wingman support and help from Connor. I bet we'll look back at those shenanigans down the line and just SMH. I even tried to initiate a failed thirst trap ... or nah.
 
The Art of the Thirst Trap:
Thirst Trap - n. - an action, purposeful or unintentional, that makes people thirsty and piques their interest in you; subtle things you do that other people find wildly attractive

• Pensive Look - Zoning out in the most attractive way possible, either clasped hands resting with elbows on needs or fingers gently resting on the face
• Hair Push - Connor's signature subtle move - casually adjusting your hair, single-handed looks more coordinated than the double palmer
• Lip Bite - Joteng's personal quirk - Nervous habit; bite the bottom lip, drag it across, finish with full  L.L. Cool J style lip lick and pout
• Morning Voice - the deeper and scratchier the voice the better; when you've just woken up from sleeping or taking a nap, this is prime flirting time
• Tie Adjustment - Slightly loosening and then adjusting your tie, or having someone else do it
• High Water Jeans - Cuffing your jeans or hiking them up to just past the knees when going barefoot or doing something physical
• T-Shirt Cuffs - Roll the edges on both sleeves to accent your arms (regardless of whether you hit the gym or not)
• Hoodies - Halfway on top of your head, exposing some hair

 
*Check back for the other half of this post including the biggest turn ons.

My blog post question for the day is ... what's your approach when you've crush? Apparently none because I never do or say anything about it. For once I'd like to be bold and confident, but how the hell do you do that?