Riding Solo

The 20s are all about enjoying yourself. I don't know about you but sometimes (actually most of the time) I get tired of people. The conversations, the awkwardness, the social cues, and all the drama in between get to be too much to fast. You come into contact with so many people every single day and it can be overwhelming. When you get to be alone it can be a little from life, the world, and the chaos that comes with it. You have to learn to be alone and now's as good a time as any. Hunker down, turn off your phone, and get ready to start ridin' solo. 

Tell me why the majority of non-celebrity people I follow on twitter are concerned with nothing other than finding a bae. (Bae - n. - a slang term that stands for "before anyone else" signifying some kind of relationship; Ex. Do you have a bae or are you currently #singlereadyomingle?) I cannot scroll my twitter feed without seeing the hashtags #thiscouldbeusbutyouplayin, #cuddlebuddle or #foreveralone. It's like everyone is so damn thirsty. Why? (Half of them are basic and aren't baeworthy, or baematerial; *hate/love my generation) Why is everyone looking for a partner when they don't even know who they are themselves? Someone answer me that because I'm going to say young people nowadays have a serious aversion to being alone. You cannot find someone to be with if you can't even be with yourself. Who the hell is supposed to like you if you don't even like you? It makes no sense. Sometimes I get frustrated seeing unbearably picturesque couples holding hands, showing affection (aka excessive PDA), and just looking happy (whether or not they actually are is beyond me) but I don't care because I refuse to settle for anything less than that. Until I find someone willing to want to understand every part of me and respect who I am, I'd rather be walking alone. Yeah, I want a bae but I want my bae and no one else. Lauren Conrad in her semi-infinite wisdom said it best, "When you are looking to meet someone, you are looking to settle. Because you are not looking for someone, you are looking for anyone." That's the truth. You have to know your intentions in putting yourself out there and do it for you more than just to be with someone. Saddle on up or stay ridin' solo.
  

This new age thing we like to call relationships are totally not what they used to be. All I hear when people are talking about their "relationships" are the signs of situationships they've fallen into. What's a situationship? Comedian and reformed pimp (is that a thing?) Kat Williams said, "People aren't even dating anymore. They're just talking, catching feelings, sleeping together and ending up in situationships." People are constantly complaining about not having loyalty or being able trust other people, especially their partner. Nope, that's unacceptable, and here's why. The whole main piece, side-piece culture thing is actually despicable. Focus on staying true to your true bae and forget everyone else. Why are you fooling around, texting other people suggestive things and flirting away when you know you're supposed to be in a committed relationship? You had better define that damn relationship and call it what it is. If you're not on the same page with your partner about what you are then are you anything? One person thinks you're exclusively seeing one another and the other thinks you're just messing around and so they continue to do so even while you're together. Hooking-up and being in a relationship are two very different things. There are always strings attached, we're human, that's what we do. If you're looking to be in a relationship, you're doing it wrong. You don't care who it's with just that you're in one. The entire concept of "cuffing season" mars the marvelousness of relationships. Cuddle weather really? You just want someone to keep you warm, so that's what they are to you ... a damn blanket. Come on, you can do better. What I see nowadays is a generation need for attention from other people. Like I said before people need to take time to be with themselves. Stop hopping from relationship to relationship without a break, pause, or time to recover in between. Stop giving yourself to other people or else there will be nothing left for yourself. Stop avoiding the real problem that is you and how you feel about yourself. It's crazy how obsessed we can get about getting likes, retweets and favorites because we're substituting that for actual connections with real live people. When did we get hooked on all this attention? If you're relationship is purely textual, it's not a relationship. You have to be able to have actual conversations. Also, leave other people out of the mess that is between two people. Social media, if you're fighting over heart-eyes emojis under someone's instagram picture, missing from snapchat top friends, or sliding into someone's vine DMs, then you have way bigger problems. Cut yourself off from other people and focus on who matters to you. If you're doing the Batman and Robin sidecar style, then stop acting like you're riding solo.

A couple weekends ago almost the whole day alone. I couldn't even remember the last time I had done so. I was in my apartment and soon came to realize the wi-fi was out. To be honest, At first I was not about it. I was thinking what was I going to do for the day without the Internet and then I reflected and understood just how actually sad it was. My dependency on being connected to other people has reached an all time high which was a personal low. I decided to cut off all communication and just be with myself. Truthfully, it was was one the best days I've ever had. I walked around in nothing but boxer-briefs for the majority of the day, blasted music and paraded all over my place singing, shaking my everything, and enjoying myself. I lit a scented candle, cleaned the entirety of the apartment and typed two blog posts. I ordered Chinese food and gorged on it. Everything was so much easier without the constant distractions of obnoxious red notifications, pings, or vibrations. I felt comfortable. I felt refreshed. I felt alive. It was awesome. I could hear my own thoughts again and it really have me some clarity. I remembered just how I actually really like myself. I know it sounds weird but I'm so much damn fun. I appreciate my own ability to make do alone and there was not a moment that I was bored. Evening came and I broke my  blockade of the outside world to meet up with my friend Sam and hit Panera (those m&m cookies & the Fontina grilled cheese are my everything). After dinner we went to see Marvel's Guardians of the Galaxy. Great movie, well casted, epic adventure, superb cinematography, and funny with some real heart. Chris Pratt is so regular, it's awesome and it works. Went home to play some RollerCoaster Tycoon and hit the sack. The next day Sam and I walked a good mile or two to the Colchester causeway for some epic views and worthwhile adventure. We grocery shopped and I hung out with my fraternity little, David. I was feeling spontaneous some played some frisbee on the green before parting ways. Two of my friends and fraternity brothers, Dylan and Connor dropped by to visit. It was great to reconnect with them. I don't think I realized how much I missed them until I saw them again. I was happy to recognize I could ride solo and be okay with it. 

My blog post question for the day is ... what's something you do you for yourself just because? Usually for me it has to do with food and just eating, being a mess, and not caring about what I look like, for once, at all