Youthful Life: X

"It's not that I dislike many people. It's just that I don't like many people." Bryant Gumbel No one likes to be dislike d. It's sewn into our DNA that we just have a general disposition and a need to be liked. We want people to want us. We want them to like us, get excited when we're around, love us. We spend so much of our time devoted to getting people to like us. We shouldn't have to convince, beg, or plead with people for them to like us. We don't owe anyone ourselves. We don't have to give the entirety of who we are, or pretend to be someone else in a futile search for the approval of others. If we have to persuade someone to accept, tolerate, value us then maybe those people truly are undeserving of all that we are. And, and, and, we ourselves do not have to like anyone if we don't want to. "Like" should an enthused, jovial, and benign feeling we have for another person whether friendly or romantic. We get to reserve t...

" Life has taught me that it is not for our faults that we are disliked and even hated, but for our qualities." Bernard Berenson The biggest woe of dating besides superficiality, search preferences, ghosting, fizzling out, and ambiguity is the asymmetrical like. Nothing is more disappointing than liking someone and them not liking you back. I don't know about anyone else but when I like someone I have this dastardly habit of letting my imagination run wild, with them in tow no less, only to have it remain nothing more than a dream. There's nothing like being abrupt woken up from a good dream. It's all pinterest board weddings, rom-com love story arcs, and Instagram bae unbearable cuteness until reality hits, and the "I'm just not that into you" brings me back to down to Earth. The truth is being "in-like" is the same as actually liking someone. Sometimes I build people up so much in my head that who they are is distorted by who I imagi...

Truth - Relationships can be fickle. One day things can be fast and loose; the next, things are radio silent. Sometimes it's that lightning strike of a connection that disappears just as quickly as it flashed in your life. Other times it's a blizzard that inundates you for days on end and yet slowly but surely dissipates into nothingness. The continuity between it all is that at some point that presence is not permanent - fleeting at best. What is it about the way people communicate now that allows for transience? Why do some people just fizzle out of our lives?   "O what is life, if we must hold it thus as wind-blown sparks hold momentary fire?" Ada Cambridge   Have you ever watched a sparkler burn itself out? There's that initial spark of blinding light, followed by sparks flying in all directions in the most simple and yet spectacular fashion, and soon enough what is left is a burnt carcass of something that used to literally/figuratively light us u...

Being a teenager is all about reading signals and making moves. Let's be real, college is not only to get an education, but it's to find that special someone. It's about playing the field, working the room, and being classically "single and ready to mingle." To all the people out there who fear they may be #foreveralone - I'm right there with ya. It's because we're going about this whole flirting/dating/relationship/casual hook-up thing wrong. We've been trained to do it one way and one way only, but the reality is that way works a specific kind of person that we all can't be and definitely aren't. Forget it and let your body talk. Societal norms - whether we're aware of them or not it's what we base all our standards off of. People walk around and think that literally nobody they see on campus is hot because they're freaking looking for Taylor Lautner, James Wolk, or Armie Hammer - you're going to be disappointed, that...

Being a teenager is all about taking risks and making moves. It's about keeping calm and carrying on. It's doing something bold and being little courage. It's about having a little faith in the process and letting things work themselves out. It's having hope that things will work themselves out and that they'll turn out better than they started. It's about making leaps and bounds. This past week has been a crazy busy amalgamation of events. It's been a challenge, and definitely a test of my character. How far am I willing to go, how will I push not only myself but other people. What am I capable of and what can I expect from other people. I'm going to keep this post super short. Let's just say Monday can be summed up with freezing temperatures and a shat ton of walking around campus (the life of an RHA President). I also was doing double duty when I hit up my fraternity's recruitment pow-wow, and afterwards was walking down the stairs in the...

Being a teenager is all about getting your flirt on. Yup, I said it - every once in a while you've got to go out of your comfort zone and go after the cute girl across the way. When you see someone that catches your eye, it's that instant spark, the moments the surge of electric runs through you and it's like lightning. Then a few moments later you hear the thunder and that's the beating of your heart. It's about to go down, this is lightning. Going to the mall during the day is one of the weirdest things ever. I know it's like senior citizen time where they just go window shopping and browse around, but truth is - not all people in the AAA club are like Betty White. Some people love the oldies, but I'm a modern man and I prefer the kiddies - preferable days old newborns (that sounds really weird, I just really like babies). Anyway, my mom and I pick up my sister, Bianca, from her long day (an hour and a half exam) from school and we're off to down...

Being a teenager means that you can pretty much justify anything you do with being young. You all know I love to make up words, it's what I do. Some of my favorites being sketchtastic, slutsketeering, on the real, and backstabbing bia. But let me tell you some of the best teenage terms have to do with food. 16 and Pregnant, how about that dumb girl is Prego, like the meatball sauce. Tall glass of water, how about you could crack open a Coke with those full Angelina Jolie lips. And my personal favorite, she was like a Chinese Buffett, sweet and sour, and too much to handle. Get ready to compare everything to food, it's some good eats. Last week's episode of Jersey Shore included allegedly bi-curious Deena, first of all, I'm calling bull freaking crap, little Deena the Dinosaur Dingo literally looks like a speckled reptilian egg, that girl was making out for no reason. She already had herself a Lean Cuisine in that disoriented Italian waitress, yup, there's that fo...