Recovery Mode

Being a teenage is all about self evaluation. It's about taking a look back at yourself in retrospect and reviewing what has gone down. The school has officially and it's time to take a good, hard look at what we accomplished, where we messed up and what we learned from the whole ordeal (yup, I just described college as an ordeal). The struggle is so real. Back to recovery mode.

So you all know that I'm a very honest and open person (I blog, tweet, post, and share like everything), but sometimes telling the truth can be difficult even if I'm already aware of what it is. My sophomore year of college could be described as nothing more than a colossal mess and epic chaotic proportions. Not only did I take some of my favorite and least favorite classes, I ended making the big decision to change my major. Academically I had some substantial difficulty when it came to making the grades that I actually wanted. I really wonder and will never know if I would have done better grade-wise if I hadn't been so encompassed by all my extracurriculars. I say I tried and studied my hardest, but could I have spent more time hitting the books instead of in meetings, running events or answering emails. I mean what's done is done and I have to deal with the repercussions of what I made my priorities. I'm proud to say that I went to every single one of my classes (as in no lectures were skipped), while I inadvertently fell asleep 10% of the time, I took notes like a boss despite my constant state of sleep deprivation. Grades are in and ish got real, but I'm in recovery mode and we take everything in stride.

Socially, I was an even bigger disaster. I sacrificed everything for RHA and used it as a well place defense mechanism to avoid unfamiliar social interactions (like Continuum style). I have friends but ended up questioning all of them and finally feel like I have a solid group of people to count on. I definitely was taken out of my conifer zone both with jut talking to random people which made me like campus famous, but I made huge leaps and bounds in the world of fraternity/sorority life. Even in my own fraternity I stepped it up and contributed more than I ever had before. I made a lot of new acquaintances and some friends that I'm sure will be in it for the long haul. Baby-Sam, Jeffrey, and my fraternity brothers but especially Tanner, Zach, and Dom. People really opened themselves up to and I got what I was looking for when it came to returning the favor. I played with the big dogs and came into my own as a young adult and a major force to be reckoned with on campus. I found courage and strength within myself that I knew lay latent but manifested itself when I needed it most. I'm both proud and amazing at what I've discovered that I'm capable of. Whether other people faltered, I succeeded and/or came out unscathed. I don't believe in luck, I believe in God and fate. It's sad to say but this was the year where friendships were tested and people showed their true colors. When it counted most people failed to step up and when worst came to worst people chose their sides. It may sound crazy but I'm so thankful for drama. Not only does it provide with extraness and entertainment (TV is my life), but it weeds people out and helps trim the unnecessary characters in my life story, and exposes the real villains. Antagonists beware, there's a reason you don't hear from me. "If you're not present for my struggle, don't expect to be there for my success." Totally in recovery mode.

So what is the moral of my sophomore year story. Uhm, trust no one that we are capable of doing more than we know. We can push ourselves further than we ever thought and acheive greatness. We are stronger and bolder than we think. Sophomore year taught me to challenge myself, what I've learned and those around me. I'm better because of it. Thanks to all those who made my sophomore year what it was. My family, friends, fraternity brothers, and all the randomness in between, forever grateful for your contributions to my story. You're probably wondering what I'm up to now that it's summer vacation. I've been hanging out with my sister (aka my favorite person in the entire world) - all we do is dance in the car at stoplights, crack up at vine videos, and lay around. Watching tons of TV, just started this show called Continuum (sci-fi at it's finest) and the finales of Vampire Diaries, and Arrow, doing chores, and doing chores.*Can I just say how devastated by spoiler alert Tommy's death on Arrow (he was my freaking favorite, I can't believe they actually killed him) and the twists that TVD pulled. Stefan is Silas's doppleganger, Katherine is now human, and Bonnie is still going to be dead?* Oh, next week my oldest brother, Rocky, is getting married in Michigan, and we're all getting ready for that. Also, my trip to Pittsburgh, PA for the NACURH 2013 conference is in like 14 days - after that, it'll be studying for the MCAT, and my 20th (ewe) birthday. I've seen some of friends from high school, Taylor, Chelsea, and Katelyn and will reconnect with a few other people. I don't miss Vermont or school, but I do miss some of my friends there. Check out some of my favorite pictures from this semester  (throughout this post) and my vines from this week (uhm, me pool and teleporting as in nothing to see - enjoy ... Pool Life - Pool Relaxing - Teleport ). Recovering in suburbia, naturally.

Being a teenager is all about looking back at where we've been and looking forward to where we're going. We must learn from our pasts so we don't make the same mistakes in the future. We are a leaned species, one capable of amazing adaption and perseverance. In the grand scheme of things we should be proud. We made it through the perpetual train wreck that is a college academic year. Take a load off, relax a little and step in to recovery mode.

The Arrow cast at The CW Upfronts After Party 2013 [x]
My blog post question for the day is ... what were your best and worst moments from the school year? Uhm, I would have to say my best moment (there were many) would have to be either dancing the wobble at Relay for Life or the first year picnic recruiting for my RHA. The worst moment (even more) would have to be meltdown Monday post meeting, or the late night debates that took a serious tone way too often.


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