Shot in the Dark

Being a teenager is about taking risks. It's about trying something new, and jumping into the deep end. It's about being scared shatless, driven to the brink, and overcoming your fears. It's about new experiences, making fresh memories, and adding to your epic life story. Doing the same thing gets old fast, just like listening the same old school jams will get your ears to bleed boring, you've got to spin a new track and mix it up. College is the time to load up on courage, put on that brave face, aim and take a shot in the dark.

I'm not going to lie, finishing your paper the day before it's due is just like how Chris Brown sings in "Forever" - like Jordan's on Saturday. WTE does that mean anyway, whatevs, all I know is I was able to get myself up Friday, start blogging and print off my paper before heading off to Biology lecture. Lately, that class has been going over my head, like fighter jets in a world war, I wasn't supposed to be drafted in this bio-terrorist battle, so I write bloggable topics instead of paying attention. I sit next to these funny kids, and they're cracking jokes like Alvin the Chipmunks on walnut steroids, such a mess. Class eventually ends and I make a gutsy move, taking that shot in the dark to see if I can grab b-fast in the 15 minute I have before my honors college class. I freaking powerwalk like a male-model on a runway to Alice's Café, guess who's there, Business Bro, the classiest kid around. I say my obligatory to that well dressed, polite stranger, and dip out like McNuggets to honey mustard sauce. In a flash I'm in HCOL, where we pass in our essays and when we're asked about our note-taking homework, ain't nobody done that ish. It was super awkward. I pair up with my girl Em whose's a bonanza of fun, and we tackle some rationalist thought, whatever that is. At the end of class we write questions for the ultra-pretentious Becky Skloot, who wrote that Henrietta Lacks best-seller or something like that. I'm hardcore judging that husbandless lady, from what we've heard she sounds like a bee-hive of stuck-up, she needs to listen up, honey, she might be an author but if she's getting paid to come to campus she should answer all our questions, and not frown up the one's she's already been asked, how the eff as we supposed to know what mumbo-jumbo the lady's been grilled on? Exactly, she needs to calm her cobra and find herself a man to put her in her place. Back to the dorm to power out a blog post, and I end up skipping lunch. It's whatever. I realize I have chemistry homework due at 2pm, online and it's Sam I Am to the rescue to save Jandro and I from imminent chemical doom. I'm a major mess so I take a grocery bag and just throw a mass of Lay's salt and vinegar chips, plus some pretzel twists and a pink lemonade and I'm off to chemistry lecture. The encounter happens, as I'm walking in, my staring contest anonymous partner, Mystery Model, makes his long overdue return and walks out. We lock eyes like he's pulling out a Jedi-Mind trick on me. I don't know if it's possible, but dude's dimple winked at me? I disengage and lose, as always. Chemistry class, Jandro, Krystina and I are back in our place and our professor shows the long-awaited drawing with horrible science jokes that we're responsible for. Class goes on, and I doze off, just a little, only to be awakened by a violent pinch from Jandro, baby-boy going to get it, one day soon. Time's up after the gas for the Bunsen burner wouldn't light and it's the freaking weekend. Somebody's about to get shot in the dark.

Back to the dorms to change and most of the floor runs to the bus stop. We ride the bus downtown to Church Street, and Jandro and I break off to find this Diversity Hair Salon to get me a haircut. We walk in and it smells of fake hair, burning scalp and island flavor, and of course the barber only works on weekends. In to Ben and Jerry's for a small cup of mango mango sorbet, topped with gummy bears again, and this young cool dad and his cute baby are having probs leaving. I go out of my way to hold the door for them and that gorgeous toddler gives me a high-five, baby girl (literally) made my day and the dad gave me a fist pump. I wait outside the bank looking mondo sketch as Jandro deposits his paycheck and from there we hit the stores. Inside a violin shop and next to the mall. We start at Aber of the crom, you know I'm looking for some plaid to add to the collection, and I see my friend Riker's buddy Ed, who actually works there. Employee discount = a shat ton more plaid! Into Hollister where the overpowering smell of lust and beach music scare us away. Into American Eagle to browse for sweatshirts and finally this foul place called Spencer's. Sex toys, grotesque costumes and crude jokes, all I came for were the gumballs. Just call me juvenile-Joey. I grab some kettle corn from a street vendor and it's all aboard the bus back to campus. We get stuck in some traffic thicker than sap on an evergreen tree, all while this complaining crazy dude rants about how the bus should be free on Fridays. Dear insubordinate rudeboy, shut your trap, or get to the back of the bus. I'll affirmative action your ignant ass, ASAP. Hunger calls and it's on to Harris-Millis dining hall, better known to me as H&M where cheeseburgers, spaghetti and raspberry lemonade mixed with Sprite are on my menu. Nemeis Norio, Jandro, Austin, Mitchy-Mitch, and double A join us for din-din. After sprinkling salt everywhere, I'm talking in my drink, on my plate, and on the ground we finally leave while the place is shutting down. Upstairs to play some ping-pong, taking that shot in the dark and trying something I've never done before and Jandro ends up trying this Japanese hardcore spin and his paddle goes flying. Let's just say the walls might needing a minor facelift. Duck and weave like an escaped convict and it's back to the room to watch Bucket and Skinner's Epic Adventures. Hilarious episode as always, and Sammy joins me, Jandro, and Jandro's football playing friend, Nihad (nicknamed baby-girl) as we walk to the gas station for soda and candy. Back on campus and we discover the awesome girl who does the extravagant chalk drawings. First years represent because she's got more than talent in those gift hands. I end up working on homework until I get lulled to sleep. I once again make the mistake of leaving my door open with the music on and me knocked out, an in comes Nemesis Norio, Petey Pablo and his flannel wearing comrade to draw on me in red Sharpie. Hell no, it's not happening again, I spring awake and catch them in the act and chase them off, you know what it is. Coming back after a party apparently makes you giggly and easily appeased. The girls come back and they munch like nobody's business, leaving a trail of demolished crumbs in their aftermath. Krabby Patty makes his late night return and by 3 am, it's finally bed time. Do it up all brand new, taking a shot in the dark.

Saturday morning I wake up, a mess as always and it's about to be noon. Jandro and I stop the Marché for egg, sausage, and cheese croissant (no Brie on this kwassaint) and it's off to fraternity/sorority row to Jandro's friend's apartment. I get the haircut I've so desperately needed and I finally look like a respectable teenager again, not a twenty-something soul searching bum. Everybody starts video gaming with Madden and finally some Gears of War 3, and it's time to head back to our part of campus. Twilight's in the show-show when I come back and Jandro goes to play football, so I catch up on my favorite show ever, 90210, while getting my hair all over my sheets. I rub-a-dub-dub in the shower, shave and deep cleanse my face, and I'm looking/smelling like every girl's teenage dream. I change my sheets (two weeks people, not 2 years, when you start seeing your dirty body outline, it's way long overdue) and Mister Bear's clothes. I knock out my chemistry lab report like a roid-raging MLB star and Krabby Patty comes back to pass out on his bed. Double-T (Bretton) comes to play some Halo Reach firefight and rocked out like superstars while Krabs slept. Jakey Bear and Nutella (Hazel) come on down and the haircut show starts with Pat-Pat in the barber chair, ghetto trash bag cape and hair snippets everywhere. Talks of Duck tails, feathering, and messy shaving cream later, Krabs looks like he drank from the fountain of youth. I start getting ready for my first college party, with the help of Sammy to choose the plaid for night and to the Marché for a late din-din. Jandro, Sam I Am, Nemesis Norio, Nasty-Nate in conjoinment with Krabs, Jakey Bear, and Hazel sit down for more ridiculousness. Curly fries are stolen while all the random people I just so happen to know stroll through the place. Business Bro, outside of his normal attire, comes in and acknowledges my existence with a totally classy head nod. Norio and Nate game in Black Ops while I facebook creep and google maps the party. Jandro accompanies me and we walk to the party, criss-crossing the street, until we arrive. No $5 sketchy red cup for me and it's downstairs to watch some beer (water) pong. More people start to show up, I say my obligatory hellos to my club members and it starts getting too wild for this kid. Cigarette smoke, frothy beers being spilled everywhere, and loud music, soon some kid starts rolling a weed wrap thingy (is that a blunt? - please enjoy my naivety, it's one my best qualities) and I'm ready to dip out after a measly 30 minutes. I get the heck out of there, breath in fresh air and walk back to my dorm, more than done with the typical college life. Who wants to come back out of control, messy, sloppy, smelly, and with memory loss - not me, I like being bossed up, put together, and smelling of mountainous snow and candy drops. Never again will I put myself in that situation, that shot in the dark missed. I'm in my room eating popcorn, and I visit Shan-Dawg and Ky-Ky who are strumming guitar in the lounge. Jimbo comes in, just a little bit of a mess, lots of hugging and compliments and soon Krabs comes back and it's night night.

Sunday morning is another one of those tough days. I wake up to Britney Spears "Till the World Ends" and try to turn off, but only snooze. Krabs wakes up and shuts it off, my bad buddy. I get all dressed up for church and I go to knock on Shan-Dawg's door for a good ten minutes, with no answer, so I assume the girl went to go get her church on without me. Come to find out later, girlie just overslept, but no worries. Breakfast with Jandro again in the Marché and we do some people watching. I devour my lemon tart and it's totally homework time. I give a one-two hook to the face of that stuff and punish it like kiddie being sent to the dunce corner. Jandro comes back from Rite Aid and I take my 20 minute break to listen to Shane Harper, somehow we both end up passed out for an hour. We wake and it's more homework until Krabby Patty comes back from his day out. We decide to clean up and it turns into a major motion picture. I'm talking hands and knees scrubbing the shower which keeps getting stained red. Spiders are killed, the bathroom is vacuumed. Brooms and bath matts are beaten out of the window and all is made right in the world. 5:30pm rolls around and it's time for the weekly family dinner. Most of us are there, with our excessively long table, mountains of food and catching up on each other's lives. Hannity Insanity, MAbby, Jandro, Sammy, Ky-Ky, Shan-Dawg, Nemesis Norio, Natty Dan, Double-T, No-Crap Carolyn, and Big Ben all make an appearance for our reconnecting time. Talk of purchasing a tortoise, french fry pilfering, and recollecting the weekend's events go down. I grab my trusty light blue pen and pad of paper and head off to my UVMtv meeting in the student center. Same thing, free pizza, and tons of inside jokes, that I now understand and partake in and we're readdy for the show this week. Back to the dorm to write this blog (ooph, awkward paradox) and JaMocha Shake and idk, her BFF Zule come visit, looking to make cookies. I search for the goods and all is well. Shots in the dark.

Being a teenager is about locking, loading, and spraying your curiosities all over the place like a shrapnel rocket blast. Taking a risk can be both a good and a bad thing. You may enjoy your new situation, or it might confirm your preconceived notions. For me, that meant, that the whole party scene is most deff not for this preptastic elitist socialite-in-training. If you try something and it makes you uncomfortable, it's up to you to be proactive and get out of there. You control your life and make your choices. Peer pressure can blow me, you should do things because you really want to. Your happiness and safety come first, always. Shoot in the dark and get rid of some of that angst.

My blog post question for the day is ... what do you do at sketchy parties? Usually I text my friends, tweet ridiculous things, read some USA news or pretend to be getting a phone call.


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