The Pursuit of Friendship

Being a teenager is all about figuring out where you belong. College moves by at mind blowing speeds, like those falsely advertised cell phone company 4G fast. It's already the end of first semester and it's crazy to see how far we've come. I've met so many people, seen too many faces, and made memories that will last my entire lifetime. Still, I still feel like I haven't reached my full potential. I have this tingly feeling (maybe it's my itchy navel man trail) that there's something missing in my life. Whether that be the girl of dreams/future wifey, some kind of power, or perhaps my destined best friends are out there, somewhere on this big green campus. Acquaintances are great but I don't about you but I'm looking for the people that will be standing next to me at my wedding, not who I'll occasionally hang out on a lazy Saturday with nothing better to do. Will and Jaden Smith got it right, this is the pursuit of friendship.

Friendship is one of the important things in your teenage life. Without friends you're adolescent years would be a total mess. Friends keep you in check, understand you without you having to speak, and can brighten you up in a matter of seconds. College seems to foster friendships of convenience. It's like ordering a pizza and only getting cheese instead of getting the toppings you really want. Why stop now when you can go all the way and find the people who literally complete your life? I sometimes wonder if I would still be close with my friends right now if we didn't happen to live together in a suite or in the same hall? Truthfully, maybe not so much. I've yet to find the few people that can finish my sentences, get me to cry laughing, and understand my need to make fun of pretty much everything and everyone. You shouldn't be friends with someone just because it's easy, you should be friends with people because you truly care about them and they about you too. The best friendships are the ones you have to work at and the ones that you couldn't spare to loose. I like to think of my best friends as my undergarments, as in my plaid boxers that match whatever outfit I'm wearing, as in being closest to me. Without them I'd be naked, and even though I might be Greek demi-god in the nude, that's not a sight anyone should be seeing anytime soon. Everyone else is a layer I could easily loose, especially if they colors don't coordinate with the ensemble. It's simple to be friends with people because you have something superficial in common, like the same major or class. But it's when you get to know them outside of that single context that you can really figure out who they are and if they're really bromance/bestie material. It's the pursuit of friendship people, and I'm not going to stop until I get enough.

College is hard because you don't have your best friends to keep you check and regulate the chaos that is your life. When I come back from a tough day of ridiculousness with classes, extracurriculars and social interactions I don't really have someone who gets me and diffuse the situation. I know those people are out there somewhere on this campus. I need to find the Stiles to my Scott like Teen Wolf Style. The Kenan to my Kel, and the Cockroach to my Theo (Cosby Show), and the Chloe Sullivan to my Clark Kent. College is rough because to be friends with someone, like for real, it takes a long time to get to know them. The basic questions get hashed out over multiple conversations and if you only see them in passing, you're not going anywhere. The people you want to be friends with are those you aggressively seek out. I'm not talking about crossbows, stakes and holy water to hunt them down like some sort of rabid vampire but you've got to be diligent with your communications. It's like a media storm with tagging in tweets, facebook wall posts, texts, and phone calls - pull the psychopath ex-girlfriend/boyfriend routine on their ass and set up some play dates (why yes I still go a play dates because I'm a child). No seriously, make time to hangout and just chill. Getting food, playing video games, being stupid in your hall complex or walking around at a party or in town is more than enough to create a substantial bond. It's totally necessary if you want to come out of college with something more than alcohol poisoning, fighting scars and some sort of diploma. You've got tons of acquaintances, we all do, but it's time to up the ante and turn some of those random buddies/biddies into real friends that you're regular contact with. Y'all need to be like a freaking STD, the gift that just keeps on giving and never goes away. Pick out a few that you really like and become true bros and sista-girls. We're on the pursuit of friendship.

How do you know if you've found your best friends in college? It's the same as it was in high school, when you life feels incomplete without them, you'll know. If you think about how ridiculous you guys are in public and how unbelievably stupid you are when congregated, oh you'll know. If you can by without a friend, then that person is most deff not your ride or die homie for life. It's great and necessary to have close friends that never attain the elite best friend status, but you'll feel it inside you when you've for real got a budding bromance or bestiehood in the making. Calling someone your best friend is like saying you love someone, don't say it unless you mean it. It's awkward as eff like the Amanda Show Dancing Lobstahs to take back or when Niall from One Direction Irish dances all over your arse in a dance off. Reserve the best friend title for people who truly deserve it. Keep in mind that just because you bestow it upon someone doesn't mean the feeling is mutual (why does this sound like a relationship talk). It sounds like a love talk because I can wholeheartedly say I love my best friends, Tay Jay and Chelsayuhh. I mean I love my Krabby Patty and most of the time Jandro, and Sammy too but I doubt they feel the same way. Maybe someday we'll get there but we're nowhere near close enough. If people still do things that bother you then they must not know you. You're best friends know exactly what makes you tick and what sets you off like a nuclear bomb. So what I'm saying is go out on a limb. Pursue friendships with people you usually wouldn't and I promise you'll be surprised with the results. Show an interest in some dudes and some chicas and let know you want to be a semi-homo-errotic friendship with them. If they want you bff-card then swipe on through and if they blow you off, then chuck the deuces and move on. You've got time and there's a seemingly endless number of people to sift you. The right ones are out there just for the pursuit of friendship.


Being a teenager is all about finding you're place no matter where you are or who you're with. College forces you to go out of your comfort zone and make the effort in finding friends. It's about stepping up your game and showing who you are whenever possible. You only get one shot to make a good first impression so you'd better make it count. We're on the pursuit of friendship.


My blog post question for the day is ... what do you look for in best friends? I'm all about the funny. If you can get my humor and can also make me laugh uncontrollably why are we not hanging already. Get over here and let's be each other's kid's god parents, duh.


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