Better With the Lights Off

Being a teenager means that you can't always be picking, and you need to sometimes take what you can get. I'm talking with relationships, not everyone is going to want to date you, and so that means you can't be too stingy in who you allow in to date yourself. It can be a hard thing, you need to know when to settle and when to trade on up for someone better. Better With the Lights Off is the newest collaboration hit from the New Boyz album Too Cool to Care and it features the one and only Chris Brown himself, the music video is literally so awesome. Turning out the lights, glowing in the dark and getting wild. But the lyrics of the song are the best part, is it true that some people really do look better with the lights off?

The grimiest line from the song is, "Every guys want to know what it's like to turn off the lights and turn Khloe to Kim" as in the Kardashians, such a low blow. As teenagers we've got tons of terms for people with not the steamiest of faces. I'd brown bag that and take it on home - seriously, she's not a can of Ravioli from the grocery store. He's got a butter face, first of all, WTE does that even mean, who started that and where did it even come from. Is that like you've cover that up with butter, what about jelly, peanut butter, orange marmalade, shoot you just go all the way and Nutella that up, mmkay. And of course, keeping the lights down low, just like you like your bass. It' kind of weird to get with someone only because they've got a hot hod or a smoldering personality. Personally, if the hotness monster doesn't get me starstruck every time I see her face, then it's not going to work out. Baby girl, you've got to be hot as hell, or at least get me twisted up just to see you across the room. If you have to do your business in the pitch black dark, that might be a problem. Washboard abs, thighs of thunder gods, full lips, ghetto booties, and bobangas for days are not enough on girls/guys to warrant a  relationship, that's a behind closed doors, sloppy hookup.

Is it wrong for you to imagine that you're with somebody else? Uhm, I don't even know how to answer that. I mean, I guess it's kind of disrespectful, especially if who you're with ever found out. For real, my perpetual love for Keke Palmer (BTW, that girl is the love of my teenage life, and can give me the business, whenever and wherever - on Degrassi, she reignited my passion for her), my crush on Victoria Justice, Claire Holt's beauty, Ashley Argota's babe alert and Charlotte Arnold's bossy attitude may seem a little out of reach but I will be marrying an actress, so deal with it. I think you need to be who you're with and that's it. It's like when you go clubbing and the girl is kitty cat crawling while hardcore grinding and the guy is legit texting another girl while bumping like none other. You can't be preoccupied. If you've got something or else someone else on your mind, it's not fair to not only you and the girl/guy you're with to be doing anything. That's like taking a whaz and talking to someone on the phone, you might drop your celly in the toilet, and the flush is super awkward. If you're going in the for the kiss, pucker up and be ready to be getting some with whoever you're with not some celebrity fantasy, dreamy McHotness, or the worst, you're former lover, as in your ex. I think you look better with the lights off.

If you're not watching VH1's Single Ladies, then you must not know the acronym S/HCGI. As in she/he-can-get-it. It's like the catch phrase. Whenever I see a girl who be getting me hot and bothered, all I do is mumble she can get it and what's done is done. Getting it, is the new term for whatever you want it to me. If you just want some homely lovin' or a wild night to remember, it's up to you. Speaking of girls who can get it, the medical school chica on TNT's Falling Skies, Seychelle Gabriel, can bandage me up in that post-apocalyptic world however she'd like. Everyone has their ideal of the perfect gf/bf, but the reality is they may or may not actually exist. If they do, they could quite possibly be impossible to find and tie down. Too many variables, they'd have to like you back. This is just too complicated, I think I like you better with the lights off.

Being a teenager is all about getting yourself some. Not everybody is going to be burning up the social scene, so when you've got someone interested in what you're giving out, you can't be too choosy. High maintenance equals low yield. Chill the check out, lower your standards and enjoy the moment. If you're somewhere else, get grounded and come back to reality. Megan Fox, Halle Berry, and Jessica Alba are NEVER going to make out with you.

My blog post question for the day is ... who's your teenage dream? Y'all know Miss Keke P can holla at me, but Vicky J can get it.


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